It Takes a Village–Or a Friend’s Parents

They’re Not Mom and Dad. In Some Ways, They’re Better.

My oldest friend emailed this past week with a blow to the heart: Joann McArthur had died, of cancer, on her 70th birthday.

It is hard to describe why this news hit so hard. Joann was not exactly my friend, though few people in life have been friendlier. She was not a relative, though sometimes she felt like one. She held a role that, in some ways, was more important than those.

She was my friend’s mother.

There’s no doubt that parents–at least for people like me who are lucky enough to have …